Vacancy for wife
Have you ever wanted someone to send you home after attending yet another wedding dinner? Have you ever wanted to stop your parents, aunties and all those '三姑六婆' from nagging about you getting married? Have you ever wanted someone to take care of you when you're ill? Have you ever wanted those annoying and persistent suitors to stop harrassing you? Have you ever hope that someone is always there to fix that tap, change that flourescent lamp, fix the TV, tune that radio? If these are what you always wanted, now's your chance....
Our client is a single man, made in 1970, athletic, healthy, no vices and holding a reputable job with a stable income.
What we are looking for: In search of a female aged between 26-30 to share the life together. She should preferbly be gentle, kind and loves the sun, sand and the sea and enjoys sports. Knows how to take care of the elderly and have a passion for things in life (except money), yet without losing the innocence.
What you will get: Succesful applicants will receive as a complete package - a husband (to shut those '三姑六婆' up), a good cook (excellent with eggs and cup noodles), shopping bags carrier, a strong pair of shoulders and arms (for you to cry on, to lean on and to sleep on), a listening ear and someone who can make you laugh. You will also receive 80% of my client's wages, twice a year all expense paid holidays and most importantly, you also get a free outlet to vent your frustrations and anger.
What you get to keep: your wardrobe, your passion for shoppping and your privilege to look beautiful (but beauty products at your own expense).
What you will lose: the privilege of sleeping alone on a big bed, some freedom.
Applicants who can cook well, have a job and scored distinction in home economics will be given preferential consideration. Smokers, alchoholics and those who likes to go home at 4am in the morning need not apply.
Interested applicants please submit your application and photo via email. Closing date: 31 Dec 2004
Only shortlisted candidates will be notified.
Our client is a single man, made in 1970, athletic, healthy, no vices and holding a reputable job with a stable income.
What we are looking for: In search of a female aged between 26-30 to share the life together. She should preferbly be gentle, kind and loves the sun, sand and the sea and enjoys sports. Knows how to take care of the elderly and have a passion for things in life (except money), yet without losing the innocence.
What you will get: Succesful applicants will receive as a complete package - a husband (to shut those '三姑六婆' up), a good cook (excellent with eggs and cup noodles), shopping bags carrier, a strong pair of shoulders and arms (for you to cry on, to lean on and to sleep on), a listening ear and someone who can make you laugh. You will also receive 80% of my client's wages, twice a year all expense paid holidays and most importantly, you also get a free outlet to vent your frustrations and anger.
What you get to keep: your wardrobe, your passion for shoppping and your privilege to look beautiful (but beauty products at your own expense).
What you will lose: the privilege of sleeping alone on a big bed, some freedom.
Applicants who can cook well, have a job and scored distinction in home economics will be given preferential consideration. Smokers, alchoholics and those who likes to go home at 4am in the morning need not apply.
Interested applicants please submit your application and photo via email. Closing date: 31 Dec 2004
Only shortlisted candidates will be notified.
posted by The Bounty Hunter at 00:35
3 Comments:
Hi,
I wonder if this application is too late - 12 days past your closing date. Never had the opportunity to log on due to some crises. Missed the advert thus. Still giving a go at application. Hmm..how should i mail you my pictures? I'm no smoker, can cook, and definitely do not go home at past 12 midnight. But there is something else which i'm not sure will take my eligibility away...someone from a fragment of your past history, still is eligible??
Have a wonderful new year!
Glad to learn you are keeping well, especially after the unfortunate catastrophe. You've been in my thoughts.
Take care still.
I don't know if you know who I am..but in the event you dont, let me remain anonymous.
Take care!
Alamak! This was meant to be a joke lah... :P
Sorry for the misleading advert... Sometimes nothing to do on the island, so come up with all sort of silly things... paiseh, paiseh... :)
The response to vacancy for wife was a tongue in cheek one too! Convincing eh, the application?? =)
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